Sunday, April 3, 2011

PARK JIN-KYUNG / a five-paragraph process analysis essay

 

Volcanoes , facsinating natural creatures

The planet B612, where the little prince lived, had a couple of small volcanoes, two active, one extinct. The little prince carefully cleaned out his active volcanoes. They were very convenient for heating his breakfast in the morning. If they are well cleaned out, volcanoes burn slowly and steadily, without any eruptions. Volcanic eruptions are like fires in a chimney...

 

On our earth we are obviously much too small to clean out our volcanoes. That is why they bring no end of trouble upon us. Then, what is actually a volcano? A volcano is a kind of hole in the Earth's surface that can allow molten rock and volcanic gases to escape from far below the Earth's surface. Volcanoes can exist in any form, while many of them are mountainous in shape.

 

Volcanoes are various in shape, but they all erupt in relatively the same process. It begins when the pressure on the molten rock, magma, on the bottom of the volcano starts to build up. This building pressure causes the magma from the chamber to force to go upward to the vent which is the main hole of the volcano, making it getting hotter and hotter.

 

When it is about to half way up, it turns into lava which is really hot liquid that dissolve all the gasses and molten rock. This process makes more pressure and when the volcano does not have enough space to have all this molten rock and gasses it erupts through the vent. This time, dissolved gasses will suddenly expand into steam and gas, causing a violent eruption.

 

Most volcanoes on earth are located in narrow designated geographic bands. Most of those bands are located around the edges of the Pacific Ocean. Active volcanoes have also been found in Kenya, Italy, and Iceland. Wherever located, volcanoes are fascinating creatures of nature.

4 comments:

  1. Hwang Yoo Jung 200904349

    1. This essay easily describes volcano eruption using a very fitting simile. So I can imagine the process more clearly.

    2. Your essay mainly seems to describe step by step how volcanoes erupt.

    3. It was very impressive to me that you used, in the introduction, some episodes from "Little Prince" Also, I like the following comparision in your essay.

    "Volcanic eruptions are like fires in a chimney."

    4. 1) Although the following sentence is right,it looks a little complicated.

    "This building pressure causes the magma from the chamber to force to go upward to the vent which is the main hole of the volcano, making it getting hotter and hotter.

    2)"When it is about to half way up,~"
    This sentence is the first in the paragraph concerned. So,if you change "it" to general noun, it could be understood better.

    5. I'm not sure, but the conclusion seems to need to restate your main points, which you mentioned in the introduction and body parts.

    ReplyDelete
  2. 1. Your main point seemed to be a process of a volcano erupt.

    2. I particularly like that each process is well described.
    I like your hook. Most people already know the little prince. Therefore, I think, your hook makes readers familar with your essay, but also it catches their attention.

    3. For me, it was pretty hard to recognize what you want to say after I read introduction. As I wrote, I like your hook. However, it will be better if there's thesis statement in the introduction.

    4. I am little confused whether the second paragraph is a part of introduction or body paragraph.

    ReplyDelete
  3. 200904082 Park, Jin-kyung

    Volcanoes , facsinating natural creatures
    -second draft


    The planet B612, where the little prince lived, had a couple of small volcanoes, two active, one extinct. The little prince carefully cleaned out his active volcanoes to heat his breakfast and it has no eruptions. On our earth, we are obviously much too small to clean out our volcanoes. That is why they bring no end of trouble upon us. And then, how does the volcano erupt?

    The earth's crust is just a small part of the total volume of earth. Beneath the continent that we live on, there lies a thick crust and below the crust lies the earth's mantle. Although this mantle is solid rock, it is under extreme high pressures and temperatures and due to this, mantle can melt and start squeezing out of the cracks in the rock. This molten rock called magma collects into the vast chambers below the earth's crust. Compared to the surrounding rock, the melted magma is less in density, so it floats up to the surface.

    This magma steadily pushes upward with intense force and the intense heat melts more rock, adding to the magma mixture. This magma, in turn, starts moving through the crust until the upward pressure exceeds the downward pressure of the surrounding solid rock. As a result, the magma starts collecting its magma chambers just below the surface of the earth. When the magma pressure reaches sufficient high level, the weakest part of the crack opens up in the crust, thereby forcing the molten rock to explode through the earth's surface. At this point, the magma flows out, which is known as lava, thus, forming a volcano.

    So, What we see blowing up through the cracks is a volcanic eruption and the erupting lava is accompanied by ash and volcanic rocks. The nature of volcanic eruption largely depends on the gas content and the thickness of the magma material. In case the magma is highly thick, the gas bubbles will have a hard time escaping from the magma, pushing up more material and leading to a bigger explosion. However, if the thickness of the magma is low, the gas bubbles can escape from the magma easily and hence, the lava would not be able to erupt with intense pressure.

    Thesedays, people get frightened and interested in volcano eruption at the same time because of the consecutive earthquakes in Japan and potential volcanic eruption in Baekdu-San. Actually, there's nothing we can do about it as we human are hopless in front of this powerful nature process. But if we can study more of it and keep putting effort to detect it before it happens.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Howdy, you have such a cool website, couldn't help commenting on it! Will you be so kind and give an answer to my question. Is it a paid blog theme which you can buy online or you used a default one?

    ReplyDelete